“Joe, you’re obviously a gifted entrepreneur, what with all the success your businesses are having. Since you know so much about successfully starting new businesses, can you give me some advice on getting my business off the ground?” “I know you beat this game in like a day, which has to be some kind of record, so can you give me some tips on getting past the boss on Level 3?”
“Anne, I’m still trying to figure out how you managed to get everyone such great seats to a sold-out show. You are bar-none the best negotiator I’ve ever seen!” “Those shoes are a perfect complement to your outfit. You have to be the sharpest dresser I know. ”
“We’re both really competitive, so I suppose it’s no surprise we got into such a big blowup during the pickup game yesterday. Can we pretend that didn’t happen and move on?” “We must have missed the exit. Why do they have such poor signage on this highway?”
“I understand that this is upsetting to you. ” “I can get why you feel upset about what happened. ” “I know this can’t be an easy thing for you to deal with. ”
“Is there some way I can give you a hand with this?” “I’d like to help—what can I do?” “Would it help if I took care of the paperwork this time?”
“We should probably just agree to disagree on our presentation topic. How about if we ask Mr. Jenkins to select a topic for us?” “Instead of getting stuck in a disagreement over where to go for lunch, how about we each get takeout from our favorite spot and meet in the park for a picnic since it’s so nice outside?”
“We are both entitled to our own opinions and I want to express mine now. ” “Can we please turn down the heat on this conversation? There are some important things I’d like to talk about. ” “We each deserve a chance to be heard. You’ve had your turn, now I would like to have mine. ”
“I realize that you were raised to believe that everything is a zero-sum competition and that winning is the only thing that matters. But, saying hurtful things to other people to gain an advantage on them only drives them further away and isolates you. ” “I understand that you naturally get very upset when things don’t go your way and you want to find out who’s to blame. However, blaming me for things I had no part in is unfair and unacceptable. You’re not trying to hurt me, but you do. ”
“It’s your decision to be so enraged about this situation, and I can’t do anything about that. ” “Yes, I made a mistake today, but it is absolutely not my fault that you got so angry about it that you nearly got fired. ”
“I will not stand here and try to talk to you if you’re going to continue throwing items around. That behavior is not acceptable. ” “Do not make any more harsh comments about my weight, now or in the future. Those kinds of comments are unacceptable and rude. ”
“I know you don’t intend to be hurtful, but I simply can’t be your friend anymore if you don’t stop calling me that name. I know you have the power to make that change if you so choose. ” “I refuse to keep going on this way. You’re in charge of deciding if you’re willing to make the necessary changes to keep this relationship going, or if it’s time for things to end between us. ”
