Not all traits and feelings of the Shadow are considered negative, as every individual will have a different view on what is negative. [4] X Research source For instance, celibacy may be pushed into the Shadow if an individual suppresses sexual desires because of an unwanted emotion or feeling. This doesn’t necessarily mean celibacy is “bad,” but it suggests that the individual has a negative reaction toward sexual intimacy.
For example, if someone was bullied as a child, they may bully others when they’re older as a reaction to repressing negative feelings of the past.
An example of this would be a father who lies punishing his child for lying.
For instance, if someone starts a verbal fight that later escalates into something physical, they may say they had no part in it even if they were the initial instigator.
Shadow work gives you the chance to understand yourself better by facing the parts of yourself you’d rather ignore or disclaim.
Observe patterns in the way you react to specific words, scenarios, or incidents. Ask yourself, “Why did that get to me? Why did I feel that way? What triggered that behavior or emotion?” Meditating and journaling at the end of the day can help you process your thoughts and reflect on your actions.
This isn’t something that can happen overnight, and that’s okay. Go at your own pace, uncovering a new part of the Shadow when you’re ready. Healing takes time, so be gentle with yourself.
If you’re seeking professional help with shadow work, make sure to ask the therapist if they’re trained in shadow work before scheduling an appointment.
I am worthy of love, affection, and respect. I am powerful, strong, and courageous. I honor and love my Shadow and own all parts of myself. I speak the truth even when it’s hard to tell myself. I deserve love and respect even at my lowest.
For instance, if you answer, “I’m avoiding a relationship,” sit back and consider why you might be doing this. Perhaps you’re hurting from a recent breakup or are afraid of commitment.
