Go through old pictures you have of your ex. Does he look heavier in certain pictures? Do you have any where he’s making a weird face? Find a few extremely unflattering photos. Post them to a social media site where you know he will see them. If you’re still Facebook friends, for example, you can tag him in the photos so he’ll get a notification about it.
You can also give out his emails to stores he would not be interested in. If your favorite makeup store asks for your email, give them your ex’s address. This will spam his inbox with irrelevant promotions.
Be careful not to lead his friends on, however. It can be fun to get a little flirty, but you do not want someone to think you’re interested in a relationship when you’re not.
Try to stay quiet while your friend is making the call. If your ex hears you giggling in the background, he may figure out it’s you.
Do not be mean to the new girl, however. Remember, your ex hurt you and not her. You do not want to take out your anger on someone who does not deserve it.
Consider deleting him on social media. Many people feel stung if they find they’ve been de-friended or un-followed.
There are many ways to make the guy understand why you’re lashing out. You could tell him directly. For example, “I’m not returning your texts because of how you treated me. " If you’re not on speaking terms, you could try posting something on social media you will know he will see.
Revenge can actually increase anger rather than decreasing it. If you end up hurting your ex back, you may feel guilty, sad, or empty afterwards. Wait and consider your actions for awhile before lashing out. Make sure you know everything about the situation to make sure revenge is warranted. Think long and hard about whether you’ll actually feel happier if you get back on the guy. Try to accept your urge for revenge is natural. However, remember that the anticipation may feel better than carrying out the act. You may be better off fantasizing about revenge than actually indulging in it.
Pick a form of exercise you enjoy that you’re likely to stick to. If you love riding your bike, for example, start taking long bike rides a few times a week. Be careful getting into a new workout routine. Always talk to a doctor before starting a new program, and ease into any form of physical activity. You want to avoid strain.
Allow yourself to experience and deal with your emotions. If you need to feel pain, do so. If you need to cry, have a good, long cry. Do things that make you happy. Go out and see a movie with friends. Go visit your family. Sometimes, being happy can be a form of revenge in and of itself. Imagine your ex seeing happy social media posts of you thriving without him. That may hurt him more than any directly vindictive action on your part.
It’s natural to focus on the pain now and again. When you feel yourself doing so, find a way to gently pull yourself back into the present moment. Think to yourself, “That was then and this is now. I want to move forward. " Think about all the good things in your life. Focus on your hobbies, your career, and your social life. Do not get sidetracked by petty thoughts.
You don’t have to agree with what the guy did to forgive him. You can simply acknowledge that negative actions do not make him a bad person overall. Think to yourself, “This guy made a mistake, like we all do. I’m ready to let it go. " Remember, forgiveness is not a sign of weakness. It actually takes a lot of strength of character to forgive someone for hurting you.
Write down how you feel and why. Try to find the best way to articulate how you were hurt. Focus on what you expect to get out of the situation. Do you want an apology? Do you want your ex to understand how he hurt you and feel bad?
You want the conversation to flow naturally. You do not want to react with surprise or frustration if things unfold slightly different than you imagined. Go into the conversation acknowledging you’re uncertain what will occur. This way, you’ll be better equipped to handle unexpected turns.
For example, you may be inclined to say something like, “It was incredibly hurtful that you lied to me about needing time to yourself. You immediately started dating someone else. You could have just told me you weren’t interested in me romantically. " Rephrase the above sentiment using an “I”-statement. For example, “I felt incredibly hurt when you told me you didn’t want to be in a relationship and then had a new girlfriend in a week because I wish you have been honest with me. "
You can end the conversation by saying something like, “I know you maybe don’t think you did anything wrong, but I need you to apologize. " You will feel a lot better getting your feelings out and receiving an apology. Once your feelings are vindicated, you may be better equipped to move on.
