Ask yourself if you’re compromising your values, opinions, or clothing preferences for your partner. Remember who you were before the relationship, and consider how that differs from your current state.
If you are constantly going where he wants to on dates or visiting his family and friends, you need to think about why. If your girlfriend never wants to go to parties, go out for dates, or always makes you stay in, you need to consider if this is the kind of relationship you want. However, make sure to account for the possibility that your girlfriend is dealing with something that makes it hard for her to go out, such as unresolved anxiety issues.
If your significant other starts to restrict who you hang out with or how much you see your family, consider this a warning sign. If you and your girlfriend are too dependent on each other for everything, then you may be in a codependent relationship. This is when 1 or both partners base their self-esteem on the other person, and it creates an unhealthy dynamic. [2] X Research source Telling you what type of clothes to wear, restricting the music you listen to, or deciding who you are allowed to be friends with are examples of controlling behavior.
Constant questions are an indication of a lack of trust. Jealousy about hanging out with others is a trust issue.
If you’re hearing criticism about the way you look or your personality, this is a warning sign of a bad relationship. Constant criticism indicates an unhealthy relationship. In a healthy relationship, you should feel good about yourself when you are with the other person.
Write down the warning signs you feel are happening in your relationship. Review the list to get a clear picture of what is truly happening. [6] X Research source Talk to a close friend or family member about your concerns to hear someone else’s view. Know that you have the power to make a change and to get out of the relationship.
If your relationship has had a history of abuse, it is important to let someone know your plans to help provide you with safety following the break up. You should also develop a safety plan for when you leave the relationship. This should include getting support from loved ones and domestic violence professionals, anticipating a change of heart and resisting the urge to stay, and having your things ready to go. [7] X Research source
”If I start to miss my ex, then I will call a friend to go hang out. ” ”If I begin to regret my decision, then I will write out a list of the reasons I left. ” ”If I become depressed over the break-up, then I will seek out help. ”
Large social gatherings may create embarrassing scenarios for a break-up. Consider meeting in a quiet public space to avoid confrontations.
Make sure you stick to the facts so you aren’t caught up in emotions and use “I” statements to avoid putting the other person on the defensive, such as, “I have been unhappy with our relationship lately, and it’s time to end things between us. “[10] X Research source Deliver the message in a calm, direct voice so your significant other knows you are serious about the decision: “I am breaking up with you. " If you are afraid of your significant other having a violent reaction to the relationship ending, you should not meet in person or alone. In this case a phone call would be the better option.
Delete your ex on all social media accounts. Take your ex’s phone number out of your phone. Go to different places for entertainment where you won’t see your ex. Ask your friends not to talk about your ex to help you create distance.
Learn from the relationship rather than regretting it. Try to focus on what you want moving forward to help you stay positive and to move in the direction you want to go. Be kind to yourself. Try not to overthink the reasons why the relationship went bad. Focusing on the past will only hinder you from thinking about the future.
Forgive yourself by stating it aloud or writing it down. Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and you can learn lessons from the failed relationship.
Take a class in something you used to enjoy learning about. Join a club. Pick up a hobby from your past.
Don’t feel ashamed if you need to ask for help. Many people find themselves in the same place, and professional help gets them back on their feet. Use your family and friends for emotional support to help rebuild yourself after a bad relationship.
