How To Get Someone Who Hates You To Like You 12 Steps

Intentionally making your life difficult (deliberately annoying you, messing with your work, for instance). Ignoring your words and conversations, especially when you’re trying to speak with him/her. Talking trash about you behind your back. Throwing unwarranted cruel language and insults your way at every opportunity. Acting rude to you, but being very kind to others. Also, if he/she suddenly acts angry or annoyed around you when he/she didn’t seem to be before, that’s a sign that they don’t like you.

If they are uncomfortable, just flash them your pearly whites and say, “It’s all right. Let’s just try and be better friends in the future. " If that seems a bit condescending, you can go with, “I understand if you’d rather not talk about it. I just noticed that you don’t seem to like me and was curious. " If they tell you a reason why, say “That’s good to know. I’m working on being a better person, and not doing ________. " If you can give them a concrete step, like you’re trying to make less of a mess in the work kitchen to be more respectful, let them know. If their reason is unreasonable or dumb, just admit that not everyone’s perfect and move on. Don’t waste any more breath trying to tame a jerk who doesn’t want to be tamed or hates you for a really immature reason. They might say that they “just don’t like you”. If that’s the case, accept that some people just can’t bring themselves to like certain others. It’s nothing personal.

Be direct without being pushy. For example, say one of your coworkers hates you because you backed into his car a few weeks ago. “Listen, I’m really sorry about your car. I made a mistake, and I shouldn’t have been so careless. I feel horrible, and I want to find a way to make it up to you. " If you still don’t know what caused the problem, say something like, “Hey, I’m not sure what’s up, but I’ve noticed that you’re kind of upset with me. I hope I haven’t done something to piss you off. What’s up?”

Ask yourself why you want to improve your relationship with someone who doesn’t like you, especially if the way they treat you affects your self-esteem and confidence. [5] X Expert Source Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFPClinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor Expert Interview. 29 November 2021. Hate is an extreme, passionate emotion. If someone is so invested in disliking you, then they likely have other things going on in their life that have made them so angry and upset.

Remember the quote, “haters gonna hate”. Truer words have never been spoken. Don’t let your life revolve around someone who hates you.

If they don’t have any lunch at lunch time, offer to give them something of yours. If they make a joke that they and their friends find funny, laugh. If they respond with anger or hatred to your kindness, just walk away. It’s a defense mechanism for the hurt and lonely – not true hatred.

Trying to win over someone by harming yourself is pointless. If they’re going to screw it up intentionally, then forget them. You’ll find plenty of other friends who aren’t so cruel.

“How was your day/weekend?” is the simplest, but most effective token of friendship you can offer, and you can use it anytime, anywhere. [9] X Research source Ask questions about them instead of talking about you. [10] X Expert Source Lisa ShieldDating Coach Expert Interview. 11 March 2021. He already hates you, so giving him more of you isn’t doing you any favors, right? But people love to talk about themselves. Focus on listening, getting to know where they come from so you can become a better friend. [11] X Research source Find shared interests. Solving the hatred isn’t necessarily enough – not if you want to ever be friends with someone. Try to find something that you can talk about together. Maybe you both like the same sport, or riding motorcycles, or dancing, or collectible cookie jars. [12] X Research source