If he has voiced his concern about not being “good enough” or not “knowing how”, make it clear to him that you’d like to just try and that you won’t judge him.
It might feel kind of awkward but you should really just be frank about it. But don’t be pushy, because it might come off as you being more worldly than he is, which could make him feel insecure. Above all else, listen to what he has to say and be sensitive and understanding about it. Make sure he is comfortable about it as he could have a valid reason stopping him from doing so but doesn’t want to tell you. For example, his culture or religion may forbid such activities.
If he isn’t comfortable, give him space and give him a choice.
If he is worried about it, don’t push him. It is important to let people make these kinds of decisions at their own pace. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you or isn’t interested - he may just be nervous, for example.
This may be awkward; you could ask a youthful family member like an older sibling or cousin for advice.
You can do things a bit slower than normal to signal that you’re going in a different direction than what he is use to. When you stare into his eyes, you’re letting those butterflies build up in yourself. There’s a good chance that your boyfriend will also be feeling nervous and excited, since couples tend to mirror each other in these situations.
Spend as much time as you need.
Movement and pressure changes means he’ll want to maintain contact. Some people like intense and immediate surprises, but it can vary from person to person. [3] X Research source
You can start with the lower lip, passing to the top one and then, the moment of the truth, you’re going to try to touch his tongue with yours. Try teasing a bit, make him want more, he will respond. [5] X Research source It might take a few sessions, so be patient and see if he will reciprocate.
You can start with the lower lip, passing to the top one and then, the moment of the truth, you’re going to try to touch his tongue with yours. Try teasing a bit, make him want more, he will respond. [5] X Research source It might take a few sessions, so be patient and see if he will reciprocate.
Don’t push your tongue in too far or close both of your lips all the way over their mouth. You can try flicking your tongue in and out quickly, running it along his lips / the edges of his teeth, sucking lightly on his tongue / lips, etc. [7] X Trustworthy Source Go Ask Alice Medical advice site with content written by health promotion specialists affiliated with Columbia University Go to source
Above all, make sure that you’re matching your boyfriend’s movements and energy during the kiss. You want to be fitting together nicely like a puzzle piece rather than bumping into each other.
If your boyfriend is still bad at it, or if there is anything that you do not like or would like to change, talk to him.
If he does something weird or not to your liking just say “Hey, like this” and lead by example. It won’t be perfect the first time but you guys will find a balance with practice. Let him know that you’re not upset or disappointed, but that you want to work together to make sure that both of you are enjoying your intimate moments. Offer to show him what you like, which may put him more at ease. Remember—practice makes perfect when it comes to kissing! You’ll have to kiss a lot to really improve your skills. [9] X Research source
