Is it because you think diapers gross you out or because you want to help? Your friend is most likely wearing diapers for a reason. It is best to assume that doctors and experts have already tried their best. If your friend has worn diapers for years, your friend is most likely accustomed to wearing diapers and accepted themselves as someone who needs to wear diapers as part of their daily ritual again. Sharing the secret with you is a big step and is not the occasion for you to suggest a cure you found on the Internet. Your friend most likely has tried it already and consulted experts unable to help. Diets and other easy cures are most likely not working and cause more stress than relief. If your friend is comfortable with their life you are there to support them as a friend, leaving her/his doctor to be in charge of any possible cure. Sorting out your negative and confused feelings before you talk to your friend is important so you can remain sensitive and calm.
Would you mind talking about your own underwear with this person? If not, you might be better off just going along waiting for your friend to start this conversation. [1] X Research source Constantly talking about urine, diapers or putting on songs relating to wet pants, incontinence, water or having your friends ring tone be one of those songs is not a good subtle way to get her/him to start the conversation. Please respect if (s)he does not want to initiate the talk.
What is the goal of the conversation? Is it to have the person cut back on their diaper usage or completely rid themselves of their diapers? Or is it some other goal covered that deals with their diaper use? Do you want to be supportive, and if so how much? Think honestly how much support you can give, as diaper wearers and handling them will take a lot of psychological and physical help from friends, and can be anywhere from helping them change their diaper to covering up their lie that they might not want exposed to others to shield the wearer from obvious psychological damage if they spread it to others who spread it even further. Turn off your phone to show you care about a private conversation.
Read the rest of this guide. Consider the intimacy of the help you want to provide, where your limits are as well as bring up situations where you have doubts on how to handle it. Express your friendship to and with them. Let your friend know that you like her/him because of certain reasons including their personality and that wearing diapers does not change your viewpoints of your friendship with them in any way. Ask what word they would prefer you’d use. Some prefer calling these absorbent pants diapers, while others don’t like the connotations these words give and prefer pads, briefs or absorbent underwear…sometimes, however, the wearer might not even like any of those terms to be used and would like another piece of clothing name to refer to it as. Find a word that suits you and your friend’s level of discretion. Try on one of their diapers, to see how your friend feels when wearing them if you can stomach the idea that you are wearing one and can be assumed to be able to take it off confidently without a fuss. If you are an inquisitive person, you might ask your friend if you can borrow a diaper to try it on yourself, which can open the conversation to let your friend show their expertise and advice on their ability to wear a diaper and make them feel accepted and on equal footing with the remainder of the people in the world. Use the guide in How to Wear a Diaper to find out how you can wear a diaper like them.
Use a code word to represent when this occurs to your friend. Your friend might appreciate it if you don’t say “Your diaper is showing” out loud, but you may agree on another more inconspicuous word that is less detrimental to their health like Socks, pants, or some other term you could devise with them. Diapers can be tucked in. The top rim of the diapers are made of plastic that will help to seal in the urine while they are lying down. Once tucked under and into the diaper itself, it can become less conspicuous, but that may create skin contact with the plastic which can result in itching and skin irritation to the wearer. To decrease the height of the diaper-rim, it is better to bend this top part outwards letting the wearer’s other clothing keep the diaper in a better place on their body.
When the diaper is so wet it might leak After soiling accidents When the diaper smells. Nobody nearby likes the emanating smell. (Waterproof plastic pants can limit smell. ) Before starting a long trip with no access to restrooms Before going for a bicycle ride. Your friend might not notice when they wet themselves. Having a friend to keep notice of their diapers’ problems is of great comfort during the ride. You might also get to pick up on small subtle changes that your friend might not be aware of or has gotten used to as time has worn on while they wear their diapers. It is not uncommon to get a bit grumpy when the diaper is soaked as the wetness is subconsciously felt and irritates, but your friend might not feel that the diaper is wet as they are concentrating with the road ahead when cycling.
Having a code word might ease the situation. “I can smell your socks” is less likely to attract attention than mentioning wet diapers or asking your friend if their diaper needs to be changed. Alternatively, you can agree on a non-verbal hint like a poke or tap on their body to tell your friend that you can smell their diaper without drawing attention from anyone else.
If your friend invites you to shop for clothes together they will most likely want your input if her/his diaper is showing or if the clothing actively hides the diaper and how visible it is. You can use code words for this in order to keep it privately in the shop. However, before shopping, be careful to check for their diaper being wet to ensure other clothes that you hadn’t bought yet don’t become wet and you’ll be forced to purchase those pieces.
Are all places where semi-public nudity is expected and accepted, leading to your friend having to be extra considerate of having their diaper showing. Talk with your friend about this before planning or paying for these activities. Suggest the activity to your friend and listen to the reply. One possibility might be for your friend to visit the toilet quite often before, during, and after the activity and wearing no or a very thin diaper. This puts increased stress on your friend as (s)he has to be aware of the placement of the nearest toilet, possibly wait in line and suddenly rush away to avoid accidents. While biking usually does not include semi-public nudity it does involve putting a lot of pressure on the diaper as well as bending the diaper out of the cup shape that is naturally forming while walking. Additionally, bikes make it harder to wear skirts an otherwise good female garment for making diapers less noticeable. In case your friend suffers from fecal incontinence (s)he will have to wear a special swim diaper if you go to a swimming pool and as these garments are quite noticeable your friend will have to accept to show publicly that (s)he is wearing a diaper. Swim diapers should also be used on the beach.
Another issue is heat and skin contact with plastic. While plastic pants might be preferable in public they are hot and tight elastic bands can irritate the skin. Spending extended time with your friend at home (s)he most likely would prefer not to wear plastic pants leading to an increased risk of smell, noise and leaks, where the increased risk of leaking is mitigated by wearing a thicker diaper.
If multiple people are attending, talk with your friend about their her/his preferences of wearing diapers all the time or just during the night of the sleepover and if they want the invitees to the party to know about their problem. Prepare a list of attendants and let your friend know who has RSVPed and to make sure they know who is coming. is coming.
Diapers are put on differently when lying down than standing up. Going to sleep and turning around while sleeping, requires a tighter fit around the legs. When the wearer walks with one on, the diaper forms a natural cup to keep in place the urine to the body while giving the legs the much needed room to move freely. Lying down while changing into a night diaper during the sleepover lets your friend put the diaper on much tighter as their thigh muscles are not flexed. This brings up the situation where your friend might want to borrow your bed and have the room for themselves while changing into their night diaper. You might want to bring up this issue with them in advance of the sleepover to have a talk about it in private, and letting your friend know if they can or can not use your bed for your diaper-change during the times of their sleepover.
