Find new restaurants, bars, and coffee shops to visit. Look for places slightly outside that individual’s immediate neighborhood. Try to go shopping at stores further away from that individual’s home (if you know where they live. ) If a mutual friend invites you somewhere, ask that friend if the individual you’re avoiding will be there. Then you can decide whether to go or not.
Say things like, “I’m doing good, but I better get back to work now,” or, “I’m meeting someone for lunch in a few minutes. ” Be polite but firm when you tell them you have to go. Saying something rude or passive-aggressive will only make things worse. Vent your negative feelings later to a trusted friend or a journal, but stay relaxed and polite in person.
Holding eye contact with someone is often seen as a friendly invitation for conversation. By avoiding eye contact, you can subtly show that you don’t want to engage with them. If the person is being rude or hostile, either openly or subtly, resist the urge to respond. Think about the task at hand or distract yourself with something else to show that they can’t get to you. If you’re in a situation where you have to respond to the person, share your own thoughts and feelings instead of directly engaging with them. Say something like, “In my opinion…” or “I was actually thinking…”
Let your buffer know what you need them to do. Make sure your friend is okay with filling this role up front so that they don’t feel used or confused later on. Develop some type of nonverbal signal so that you can both excuse yourselves if you need to get away in a hurry.
Try staying calm as well. Take deep breaths, get up and stretch, or take a sip of water. Do something to distract yourself and break up your negative mental energy. When you feel the urge to say something mean, challenge yourself to instead say something polite or nice, like, “You did a great job at the presentation this week. ” This can help diffuse tension with them and within yourself. Sometimes the urge to say something might get too strong. In this case, excuse yourself quickly and politely to go calm down. Say something like, “I’m going to grab some lunch, please excuse me. ” Stay strong and confident no matter what. Rise above their negativity by refusing to engage.
Even if you don’t feel secure or strong, it’s important that you believe that you can be strong. This can help create a buffer between you and the negative people in your life. Don’t let the negative words and actions of others affect the way you feel about yourself or the way you live your life. Use positive affirmations and self-talk to break out of any negative thoughts the person might make you have. Remind yourself that you’re a good person and that your friends and family care about you. That must mean that you have positive attributes that the other individual simply isn’t willing to see.
To block calls on an iPhone, select that individual from your contacts list and choose “Block This Caller. " To block texts, go into your messages, choose the individual you want to block, and select “Details,” then “Info,” and then “Block Contact. “[5] X Research source To block calls/texts on an Android phone, go to Call Settings and select “Call Rejection,” which will take you to the “Auto Reject List. " From there you’ll just search for and select the number you wish to block. To block calls/texts on a Windows phone, go to Settings and select “Call + SMS Filter,” then switch the “Block Calls” function on. Then just hold down the number you want to block, select “Block Number,” and hit “OK. " If you use a BlackBerry phone, you’ll need to speak to someone from your wireless carrier to block an unwanted phone number from contacting you.
If you’re friends/followers with the individual on social media, you can unfriend or unfollow that person. You can also block that individual so that they cannot see what you post and cannot contact you in any way. If you’re not friends or followers with the individual on social media, or if you’ve already unfriended that person, change your privacy settings within that social media site so that only your friends can see what you post.
To filter out emails in Gmail, select a message from that individual in your inbox by marking the checkbox next to it. Click the drop-down menu, choose “More,” then “Filter messages like these,” and on the redirected page select the option “Delete. “[7] X Research source To block emails in Microsoft Outlook, simply right-click a message from that individual, then click “Junk,” followed by “Block Sender. “[8] X Research source
Make a list of the people, places, and things that cause you to feel unhappy, angry, or frustrated. Consider why those people, places, and things trigger a negative reaction in you. Think about how those triggers may come up in your day to day life, and plan strategies that will help you avoid or minimize these situations.
Instead of complaining about the person you no longer wish to be around, make a point of not discussing that person in conversation with others. Talk with others about positive things that you do enjoy. Otherwise, the person you don’t like will end up consuming a lot of your time and energy.
Make a point to notice any negative thoughts you have. Acknowledge them and let them pass without letting them take over. Over time, you’ll change your thought patterns. Remember that you can’t control the other person, but you stop letting them affect you. Stop wasting your time and energy even thinking about them anymore, and dedicate yourself to things you care about instead. You’ll always come into contact with people you don’t like, but you have the ability to control their impact on you. Take control of your thoughts and actions and focus on yourself instead of them.
Think about what makes you a positive individual. Do you compliment others or go out of your way to be kind, for example? Make a conscious effort to engage in those activities more frequently, not just so others will see you, but to cultivate a more positive lifestyle of your own. Let your actions speak for you when it comes to what kind of person you are and what type of life you live.
Think about the friends, family members, and coworkers who are always positive in the face of adversity. You should also think about who the kindest, most considerate or compassionate individuals are in your life. Reach out to those people. Make an effort to spend more time together, and try inviting them to social events so you can spend as much time as possible together.
Look for new, positive people at your local gym, a faith group, an outdoor club like a hiking group, and other places where kind, positive people might spend time. Choose a cause you really love. You’ll feel good and meet other positive, compassionate people who care about the same cause. Grab a quick coffee or have lunch with the people you meet. Even short amounts of time together can boost your mood and outlook.
