Does the shift in his mood coincide with a stressful week at school or work or has he been acting strange for months? His inattention may not be a reflection of his feelings for you, but his emotional response to a stressful or upsetting situation. Are you placing unreasonable expectations on your boyfriend? Do you flood his inbox with texts? Are you constantly checking up on him? Or, have you remained patient, calm, and trusting? Are you the only one putting any effort into the relationship?
Keep track of your thoughts in a journal. Talk through your feelings with someone you trust. Talk about your feelings over coffee with your best friend.
Take responsibility for your feelings. Use “I” statements, such as “I feel ignored,” “I am concerned about our relationship,” “I feel hurt when you choose to hang out with your friends instead of spending time with me. " Avoid “you” statements, which place the blame completely on the other person. Examples of “you” statements include “you are ignoring me,” “You don’t seem to care about our relationship,” and “you never want to see me. “[3] X Research source
Occupy yourself. If you live together, do not let him be the center of your attention. Read a book, go for a run, cook something, clean something, do anything but do not try to get his attention just to entertain yourself. Do not spend every night at your boyfriend’s house. Try to spend a few nights a week alone. This will give him time to realize that he may miss you when you are gone.
Refocus your energy on excelling at work. Take on a new project or assume additional responsibilities. Devote your free time to scrapbooking, a new club, or a sport. Finding activities that allow you to meet new people are a great way to fill your time! Get active! Join a local gym or explore a new trail. Spend time outside. Go to the beach or relax under a tree with a great book!
Visit your local art museum with a friend. Invite a close family member over to your place for dinner. Host a themed party.
Don’t toy with him by initiating PDA. Resist the urge to rub his back or rest your head on his shoulder.
Don’t spoon with him in bed! If you attend the same class, sit a different row. Separating yourself from him physically will make it easier to avoid his advances (and keep you from initiating contact too)!
Don’t turn your back to him, you won’t be able to see his reaction? Keep him in your peripheral vision; watch him out of the corner of your eye.
Only contact your boyfriend when it is absolutely necessary! Avoid him on social media too. If it is too tempting to chat with him online, take a brief hiatus from social media or block him.
Resist the urge to constantly check your phone. Keep it in the next room, turn it off, or put it on silent. Give your phone to a friend or family member. Ignore his attempts to reach you on social media platforms too! Don’t respond to his messages or reply to his comments. Block him for a short period of time if you must.
Reply with head nods and shrugs. Keep your responses brief. Use one-word answers: “Yes,” “No,” “Okay,” and “Fine. ”
