The key to effective and attractive self-confidence is to not come off as cocky or self-centered. Simply walk with your back straight, shoulders back, and head held high. Look people in the eye and smile when you talk to them. [2] X Research source Don’t act like you’re better than others by not speaking or ignoring them. Make everyone you meet feel like a million bucks.
For example, don’t let your social group catch you saying negative things like “I’m fat” or “I look hideous. " People want to be around people who feel good about themselves because that type of self-confidence can be contagious. Belittling yourself sends the message that you’re secretly low in confidence. So, avoid such language at all costs.
Practice what you are going to say to someone when you are alone. You could talk about the weather, the local sports team, outlandish celebrity news, or whatever you like to talk about. Having a topic prepared can help you feel more confident when you try to talk with someone new. [4] X Research source
Join groups or take classes that interest you. Doing so gives you a great chance of finding someone who enjoys the same things you do. You could also ask your friends and family if you could meet their friends, or talk to people who share the same religious beliefs as you do. Some of the most meaningful relationships start because of shared interests. [5] X Research source
For instance, if you like people who go out of their way to care for others, then do that, as well. If you admire people who take risks, then start taking some of your own. Be spontaneous and step out of your comfort zone. You’ll likely not only find that you are happier, but that new friends will naturally be more attracted to you. [6] X Research source
This could mean sending texts to check in, bringing them soup when they aren’t feeling good, offering your time when they need help, and opening yourself up to them. It may make you feel vulnerable doing this, but it increases your chances of finding a best friend. [7] X Research source
Ask questions like, “What’s your favorite thing to do?” “Why did you choose this career path?” or “Who is the person who influences you most?” Asking different questions like this allows you to get to know them on a personal level and opens up the beginnings of a great friendship. [9] X Research source Remember that your body language sometimes says more about yourself than verbal cues. Try to present yourself as an interested and open person. [10] X Expert Source Nicole Barile, PhD, NTPLicensed Clinical Psychologist & Nutritional Therapist Expert Interview. 12 August 2021.
Although going out and attending events together is fun, you don’t always have to do something. Just being in the same room together and chatting about what is going on with your life is often more fulfilling. [11] X Research source
If a friend tells you something, don’t share it with anyone else. Unless, of course, your friend is in danger, you should keep your lips zipped. Trustworthy people are also honest. If your friend asks you a serious question, tell the truth, even if it hurts. For instance, if a close pal asks, “Do you think I should go to second-base with Josh?” Show your concern by saying “I think you should wait until you’re sure he really cares about you. “[13] X Research source
Initially, making contact every few days or when you want to do something together is ideal. Over time, you can reach out more, but only after you’ve been friends for a while. A good rule of thumb is to follow the other person’s lead. Return texts or calls when they text or call you. If you don’t hear from them after a few days you can reach out, but only do it once. Bombarding them with texts and calls will just scare them away. [14] X Research source
If your calls and texts are unanswered, your invitations for spending time together are often declined, or you just have a feeling that something is going wrong, your friend may be backing away from you. You can ask them what happened, or you can try giving them space and see if that makes the friendship better. [15] X Research source
Take things slow and give your friendship a time to develop into something strong and long-lasting. [16] X Research source
